“My heart is, like, pounding.”
It’s with those words that Jana Kramer welcomed fans back to her first podcast episode since announcing she was filing for divorce from Mike Caussin.
Mike was not just her husband and the father of her children, he was also her podcast co-host, making this comeback episode painful in multiple ways. But the show must go on, and this first episode rips off the bandaid with a painful but frank discussion about the elephant in the room: divorce.
The One Tree Hill alum starts and stops, gets choked up,
“So sorry for everyone listening right now — this is not easy. For those of you that haven’t seen the news, I filed for divorce… a few weeks ago, and… it has not been easy, I’ll say that. Um… and honestly, I don’t even know, like, I don’t even know if I want to do the show anymore. I’m being completely honest.”
While Jana started the show by herself, as she reminds listeners, for the past few years, Whine Down has been co-hosted by the married couple. As she admits:
“Once Mike came on as a guest, and you know, we talked about our stuff, and he said that he loved sharing and so then we partnered together. So then it just felt like ours, so now it feels weird not having him on here, and… I don’t know, it’s just not… it feels weird.”
The problem was of course not that Mike loved sharing but that he wanted Jana to be fine with sharing her man’s penis with strange women.
Speaking about her decision to pull the trigger on the breakup, she confirms something everyone who knew or admired her could see — she was trying so hard to save the marriage:
“I didn’t want this, at the end of the day.”
Awww. What she says next is the most heartbreaking admission:
“I think where I’m at is, I’m embarrassed. I’m embarrassed that this is how it ended, and then I also feel like I’ve let people down.”
NO! That is awful! You should never feel embarrassed because of what your significant other did to you. You shouldn’t feel embarrassed because you gave them the benefit of the doubt, because you believed in forgiveness and growth. Those things exist — and if that man had been willing to change, he could have.
Shockingly, the Whiskey singer also confronts some unnamed confidants who — instead of supporting her — actually exacerbated her feelings of embarrassment!
“I had friends basically tell me they would lose respect for me. And those were the friends that were always like, ‘We would love you and support you no matter what.’”
WHAT?! How dare they?! You should stay in a marriage where you’re being mistreated to keep their respect? BOO!
Related: The Heartbreaking Reason Jana Was ‘Scared’ To Divorce Mike
Speaking about the relationship talk that we all heard on previous episodes, she casts a little shade his way:
“We’ve come on here, and we’ve fought, and we fought for it. The words that were spoken, they were honest from me, is what I’ll say.”
In her divorce filing, she listed “inappropriate marital conduct, irreconcilable differences, and adultery.” While she doesn’t get into specifics of what she found out on the podcast, she does open up about the circumstances surrounding the crushing revelation.
As we know, she was — and is — still recovering from her breast augmentation surgery. She says as recently as just “a few days before things came to light” she thought everything was fine, mostly because that’s exactly what Mike was telling her.
“He swore on his sobriety there was nothing.”
Oof. Makes one wonder what that sobriety is worth. Because he did cheat. And that did finally break the marriage for good.
But it almost didn’t. Jana almost stayed. She admits:
“I am the weakest I’ve ever been. I went to my therapist a few weeks ago and being like, ‘Fine, I’ll live this life. I don’t want to break up my family.’ My whole thing is like, I didn’t want this for the kids. I’ve stayed for my kids, even when other things happened.”
On the fallout after making the choice to leave, she says:
“Most of my sadness comes from my kids because they didn’t deserve this, they didn’t ask for this. And also the dream of what I thought it was going to be and who I thought I was working with.”
Promising the pod will “not be a sob show” every week, Jana ends the conversation on a strong, hopeful note, declaring:
“We’ll figure this out together. We’re on this journey together.”
As long as the “we” doesn’t include those terrible so-called friends of hers, we’re in!
What do YOU think about this latest divorce discussion? You can listen to the full talk HERE or wherever you get your podcasts..
[Image via Jana Kramer/Instagram.]
The post Jana Kramer Reveals AWFUL Details About Mike Caussin & So-Called Friends In Emotional First Podcast Since Divorce! appeared first on Perez Hilton.